Fuck appropriateness.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
