Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize