I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Randomize
