For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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