i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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