He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
