She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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