you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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