Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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