I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
