Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
