she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
