shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
