she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
