Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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