he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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