I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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