have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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