I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
