Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
