I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
