I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
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