I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
