I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
