Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
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