Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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