sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
You were trust falling into bushes
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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