Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
