Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
my being single is dangerous.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
