Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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