do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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