At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Randomize
