there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
She needs sedatives and a leash
the liver wants what the liver wants
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
