Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
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