Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
