Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
