that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
vagina is talking i cant
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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