so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Randomize
