Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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