There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
