East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
