I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
