im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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