Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
It's blow job season.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize