The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
