haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
