they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
