It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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