he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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