And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
