Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
