Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(845): View more from New York

I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.

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(972): View more from Texas

Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?

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(860): View more from Connecticut

So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.

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(269): View more from Michigan

I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.

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(770): View more from Georgia

The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".

Fav 7 3498 1022
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(417): View more from Missouri

I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.

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